It's not the end (Final blog post encapsulating folio)
The Particular is the Universal started off with a discussion on habitus - a word that I've never came across before. It's what makes each of us unique, it's like the building blocks that makes up who we are. In my blog post Habitus, I wrote about my country of birth - Malaysia, and how multicultural it is. I realise that I've never thought about my country as being something other than the name of a nationality in my life. I've never considered that it plays a big part of who I am. Prior to this, Malaysian was just a name with little to no value to me. I came into the course thinking that I would not have much to contribute because my country was so small that some might not even have heard of it before. Sure, we have a few notable stars such as Jimmy Choo and Michelle Yeoh, but when I hear their names, my mind does not jump to 'I'm so proud that they're Malaysians.'
I introduced the famous mamak in my Habitus blog post which I found interesting to write on because I've never once thought that I would be using it to reflect on the how I took everything in Malaysia fro granted. The blog post opened my eyes to a lot of things I overlooked in my own country as I begun to draw deeper into myself.
Having this discussion as an introduction to the course set me in the right direction because it made me more aware of culture and how it affects individuals. The exploration of the meaning of habitus served as a foundation to the rest of the topics in the course. I was able to guide my thinking by going back and drawing up the new information I gathered from discussing my habitus.
Not Chinese Enough is a blog post I wrote without a given prompt. I was inspired to write after listening to the guest lecture by Sanaz Fotouhi. I shared my fear of being Chinese in an English speaking household studying British syllabus. I was afraid that my involvement with Western culture had diluted my South-East Asian culture. I was afraid that my habitus wasn't strong enough to be able to qualify writing Asian inspried stories. In the post, I used screenshots of other authors who suffer from the same problem to express my concern.
I used to hide my writing, afraid that people would read and judge them. I knew part of the reason was because I did not want to get called out for being wrong. I would procrastinate my writings because I wanted to do research before diving in for fear that I might not be educated enough to write on the topic even if it was fictional.
“Also - 'Chinese' or 'Malaysian' isn't a singular thing (consider 'habitus' again). It is usually a combination of multiple things. So if you're a combination, then you're a combination.”
I'm glad I wrote the post because the above comment by me lecturer, Sree, helped me gain confidence in drawing inspiration from my habitus to use in my writings. Having those different influences is what makes my habitus unique.I would even go as far as calling my habitus a rojak which is a traditional fruit and vegetable salad dish I used to order often from roadside stalls, it’s also a colloquial term meaning ‘mixture’.
Lastly, Swimming Before, Diving Now focuses on how I discovered my habitus and how after this course, I am more self-aware and understanding of different culture. I am no longer avoiding my own culture, instead, I find myself actively seeking out inspirations from it. I wrote about realising that there was so much content in my own culture, waiting for me to run my fingers through them.
I know that this course was meant for us to learn other cultures and how to work with our world filled with thousands of beautiful cultures, but I found myself learning about well, myself. I believe it's because of my status as an international student being away from my home country that has allowed me to reflect upon my own culture. I would like to believe that I can categorise self-discover as a part of cultural understanding because prior to this course, I never once thought that I would be inspired by Asian folk tales or feel proud when a new Asian author arises.
The three blog post I chose to reflect on all have a common theme - acceptance. The fear I have of not being authentic enough is fading. It is still here, but it does not hinder me as much as before. I don’t have to be one or the other to be authentic, I can be a mixture, a combination of everything that I’ve experience. It’s the blend of different experiences that makes a person’s habitus unique to their own.
I introduced the famous mamak in my Habitus blog post which I found interesting to write on because I've never once thought that I would be using it to reflect on the how I took everything in Malaysia fro granted. The blog post opened my eyes to a lot of things I overlooked in my own country as I begun to draw deeper into myself.
Having this discussion as an introduction to the course set me in the right direction because it made me more aware of culture and how it affects individuals. The exploration of the meaning of habitus served as a foundation to the rest of the topics in the course. I was able to guide my thinking by going back and drawing up the new information I gathered from discussing my habitus.
Not Chinese Enough is a blog post I wrote without a given prompt. I was inspired to write after listening to the guest lecture by Sanaz Fotouhi. I shared my fear of being Chinese in an English speaking household studying British syllabus. I was afraid that my involvement with Western culture had diluted my South-East Asian culture. I was afraid that my habitus wasn't strong enough to be able to qualify writing Asian inspried stories. In the post, I used screenshots of other authors who suffer from the same problem to express my concern.
I used to hide my writing, afraid that people would read and judge them. I knew part of the reason was because I did not want to get called out for being wrong. I would procrastinate my writings because I wanted to do research before diving in for fear that I might not be educated enough to write on the topic even if it was fictional.
“Also - 'Chinese' or 'Malaysian' isn't a singular thing (consider 'habitus' again). It is usually a combination of multiple things. So if you're a combination, then you're a combination.”
I'm glad I wrote the post because the above comment by me lecturer, Sree, helped me gain confidence in drawing inspiration from my habitus to use in my writings. Having those different influences is what makes my habitus unique.I would even go as far as calling my habitus a rojak which is a traditional fruit and vegetable salad dish I used to order often from roadside stalls, it’s also a colloquial term meaning ‘mixture’.
Lastly, Swimming Before, Diving Now focuses on how I discovered my habitus and how after this course, I am more self-aware and understanding of different culture. I am no longer avoiding my own culture, instead, I find myself actively seeking out inspirations from it. I wrote about realising that there was so much content in my own culture, waiting for me to run my fingers through them.
I know that this course was meant for us to learn other cultures and how to work with our world filled with thousands of beautiful cultures, but I found myself learning about well, myself. I believe it's because of my status as an international student being away from my home country that has allowed me to reflect upon my own culture. I would like to believe that I can categorise self-discover as a part of cultural understanding because prior to this course, I never once thought that I would be inspired by Asian folk tales or feel proud when a new Asian author arises.
The three blog post I chose to reflect on all have a common theme - acceptance. The fear I have of not being authentic enough is fading. It is still here, but it does not hinder me as much as before. I don’t have to be one or the other to be authentic, I can be a mixture, a combination of everything that I’ve experience. It’s the blend of different experiences that makes a person’s habitus unique to their own.
Blog posts:
Habitus: https://culturecollabwithcarynn.blogspot.com/2018/07/habitus.html
Not Chinsese Enough?: https://culturecollabwithcarynn.blogspot.com/2018/07/in-week-2-of-this-course-we-had.html
Swimming Before, Diving Now: https://culturecollabwithcarynn.blogspot.com/2018/10/swimming-before-diving-now.html
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